How do we rely on the uncertainty that is memory, after loss?

Do they ever really leave you?

This stranger navigates life with your mindset, they smell like you too. The slightest twitch in a stranger can unlock the memory of you. Despite the fact you two look nothing alike I know that it is you, wearing a mask. You talk the same and this feeling is too comfortable for you to be a stranger. You exist now within every person.

When creating this series I wanted to explore the idea of memory. My main inspiration would be the use of light in Maya Deren’s 1943, Meshes of the Afternoon. Her use of light in order to conceal the identity of the person she becomes is brilliant. Think of the hazy image of someone you used to know or the association of them with the nature around you. I want my work to be a direct reflection of that feeling. The reminder that people you once knew and shared those memories with, now live through you. When they are no longer present in your life they still manage to haunt you. Now whether that is in a dreamverse or reality is up for interpretation.

Another inspiration that I used would be Rinko Kawauchi and her Illuminance, 2011 series. The use of light and coloring in this nature series is what I tried to emulate in a way in my pictures.

In dreams the ability to remember a face is always difficult. They can arrive to you as a blur, hold the face of someone you know but their mannerisms say otherwise or they can appear as I represented them. The light is supposed to illustrate more than the loss of identity. I incorporated this bright light to add a dream-like feeling to this seraphic-like character. 

In reality faces appear much more clear. You are present in your current thoughts but, what about the moments your mind starts to wander. The vibrant orange that paints that tree almost looks like her hair. Was her hair that bright? Who’s to say now that she’s no longer in your life. You’re just going to have to live with that uncertainty.